fun_like_that

We booked our hotel today!

It's really fucking happening! We're going to NYC this summer!

I bought a new laptop case on Friday. I have one that goes over the shoulder but with my back being so bad and us doing SO MUCH walking while we're there I can't have my back start out the journey in a bad way (not carrying my laptop around with me but if my back hurts at the start of the trip it'll never stop) and I don't want to tote my small rollable suitcase around on the planes like I did when I went home last month.

Anyway, long story short--I know have a kick ass, more fashionable rollable laptop case. ( See? )

ANYWAY. So we're staying in a hotel in Queens bc for the price and a bit more security than a hostel it seemed to be the best way to go. Is the estimation of an hour into Manhattan more or less accurace from Bayside, whatever part of Queens that is?

Right now I'm watching Undercover Blues (my mom and I watched it ALL THE time when I was younger) and just chilling, trying to get rid of a headache. I heart Dennis Quaid in it.

I still have a Tumblr, too. Follow me at funikethat.

My firefox is regressing to shittiness again. Now when I hover over my FF icon in Win7 and it previews the windows for me I see like- five windows instead of two. Some of the tabs are appearing as windows but when I close them the tabs close in the actual window and when I close ALL of the extra "windows" the window they're SUPPOSED to be in closes, too. But now some tabs I've already closed in the original window are appearing as new "windows" and won't let me close them. Jesus, Firefox. Suck harder. I know you can do it.

But who cares? I'm going to NEW YORK!

It's gorgeous here this week, unbelievably so. It's supposed to rain on Friday, though, which is an event in itself since it like- NEVER rains here so we'll see how that goes.

A few things:

- I'm no longer going to Comic Con. Seven of us were going but a couple can't swing it financially, another couple (including me) just weren't jazzed anymore about it (too many people, too much planning, too much hassle, etc) and some people were only going because everyone else was going so when some people dropped they did, too. Once people started bailing I realized I really just want to go as a group ANYWHERE, doesn't have to be a country away with 125,000 other people.

- I'm over Glee. I'm just waiting for the backlash now, honestly. I wasn't a HUGE fan but now it's so overhyped and EVERYWHERE that I'm tired of it. I still like the music, though.

- I haven't watched a SPN ep, really watched, since before Christmas. I've been re-watching all aired eps of The Vampire Diaries with pipry23 and I'm just getting even more into that show. So, yeah. If you're only here for SPN and have been annoyed or dismayed with my lack of SPN-centric posts it's not going to change. Feel free to defriend at will.

- Even though I'm not going to comic con it would seem there's still a trip in my future, if we can get our ducks in a row. Three of us are planning to go to NYC the same time we were going to San Diego. I AM SO FUCKING JAZZED. If only the payment would go through on my credit card so I could book the fucking plane tickets!

And that's that for now, I guess.

That quote? Line? Burst of inspiration? Was etched into the bottom of my memory box.

In high school I took all the art classes. In one of them we had a project to make a memory box. I'm very fortunate to have an uncle who is awesome at making anything, basically, and he fashioned me a very lovely ... wood of some kind box. It's has a slanted lid and a hinge and a place for a lock if I wanted & everything. It's just a small thing, about 12"x12" but it was exactly what I wanted. I painted a flower on the front and quotes from songs I found relevant at the time on the outside and on the inside I shellaced photos of friends and movie stubs and drama club things that were my whole world at that time.

The box is now filled with all my high school and early uni stuff. Photos and the wrist corsages from my prom & grad, cards, etc. Mementoes from my late childhood, early adulthood that meant something to me at the time.

I haven't been home in a couple years so of course I had to go through it. I don't really remember half the people I have photos of in it and drama is no longer a big thing in my life. The flowers on the corsages are brown and flaking off into the box and I don't even know why some of the things in the box were significant to me anymore.

The few uni things that are in there are things I put in the box because I wasn't really sure where else they should go but I wanted to save them. They're the "one of these things is not like the other" of the box. But that's where they remain because early uni was such a flux time in my life.

I've started a new memory box in Medicine Hat. It's bigger and I bought it for less than $10 at London Drugs. It's pink and feels like fake suede and if I ever trip into it or fall onto it or something it'll crumple like tissue. It's also filled with photos and movie stubs but when I look through the things in that box they have more ... memorable memories, I guess. They almost feel tangible.

Part of me really didn't want to go through my stuff here when I came home because there's so many things that bring back memories I don't want anymore. They helped form who I am now, yes, but even with all the time and space between then and now they make me uncomfortable. Some of them came up from looking into the memory box. But this time I feel calm after looking through it. I took some photos and video as I went through it because for some reason I don't know when the next time I'm going to be back here and when I'm going to see that stuff again.

I won't let my mom throw it out, no, but there's a good chance it might be anyway. She could move it to the basement or put it in the closet and then it'll get forgotten or she'll move (hope, hope, hope!) and it'll be one of those things that just doesn't get packed. I have other things I would rather have over it instead.

It's such a small box of small things; it would take up little room in a bigger box with other things or wouldn't cost much to ship back to the Hat but I've put it back on the shelf, and that's where it will stay. As I put it back I saw the quote in the bottom, etched in very clumsily by my 16 year old self, it felt okay.

This is the first time I can ever remember feeling like I WANT to go away from home again, where I'm not feeling a sense of dread and fear over leaving. I wish my mom could come with me, I wish she didn't have to stay here. I know this is the last time I'll see my dog again because she's in very poor health and her body is coming to a stop on her. I know that the next time I come here, whenever that is, I'm going to feel a very serious disconnect with the town, even moreso than I feel right now.

I fought against myself so hard to not allow myself to call anyplace home BUT home and then it just happened anyway. Not saying that Medicine Hat is where I'm going to lay my weary bones but I'm not defiantly against it anymore, either. I'll always be from New Brunswick, always be made fun of for the way I talk, always speak of my town and the area with pride. But now I'm okay to let some place else benefit from that dedication, too.